Just Breathe.

Dear ___,
I'm sorry. I'm sorry that when you finally reached out, and asked me for my help, i said no. I've spent years telling you that i'm here for you, that i'm supporting you. Then you ask me to come, and support you, and i say no. This decision has plagued me every day for months. I'm sorry that while i always encouraged you to put the cigarette down, i never reached and put it out myself. I'm sorry i refused to come to counceling with you, when you were nervous and maybe even scared. I'm sorry that i always second-guess why your talking with me, i'm sorry i always tell myself i'm your last resort. Because the truth is, i should count myself lucky that you still want to talk to me, if not for the neglect i've shown you then for the simple truth that we are so different.

I'm sorry i'm typing this on a stupid blog and not telling you in person, because i'm too scared.
-OnyxLunacy